Saturday, April 27, 2013

Warm Feelings

The day that I became a father was one of the happiest days of my life. I was amazed at how something that I helped create just came to life and had such a huge impact immediately on the world. I love the time that I get to spend with my children. Our days are filled with bike rides and fort building. Naps and Happy Meal runs. (For me) I love seeing my kids learn new things and understand new concepts that they never would have understood even a few days before. My kids are extremely happy kids. They are always laughing and having fun. They bring me cozy warm feelings.

The Culprits

Now to talk about another warm feeling. Every year our family goes the Utah State Fair. What I have learned about the State Fair is that A) it is the exact same thing every year and B) the people that you see at the fair will make you think to yourself, "Where do these people live? Because wherever they live, I do not want to live there." The reason that we go to the fair is that you get a lot of Utah culture in a very short amount of time. We have never been let down by the fair. Ok so the scene has been set, we are sitting at the fair getting ready for the night show to start. This night at the fair they had a lion show going on. I decided to put my son Graham on my shoulders so he could get a clear shot of the show that was about to begin. I was having a great time that night, we had some friends with us, we had just finished eating our Fair food and we were ready for a show. And that is when I got a warm feeling. This warm feeling started on the top of my shoulder and then carried on down the front of my chest. At first I didn't realize what had just happened. I had never been urinated on in my life and up to this point it wasn't something I was really prepared for. Once the realization hit me I immediately got my wife's attention and said, "Uh, i just got peed on." Then I walked over to the funnel cake truck and bought a funnel cake. It had chocolate swirled on it. It was delicious.

This leads me to today. We were are the Herriman rec center swimming as a family. Well, when you have a three year old and a one year old you don't do much swimming you do a lot of walking around the kiddie pool. My daughter Campbell was not into the swimming at all. Every time I would go in the water with her some massive boy child would come and splash water on her. She was very nervous to be in the water. So like any good father would do I got out of the water and sat on the bench with her. We had been sitting there for about 10 minutes when the next warm feeling of my life occurred. I was a little shocked that the urine reached my leg because she had a swimming diaper and plastic diaper cover on. But somehow, someway, the urine found my leg. I was instantly brought back to that day when her brother had done the same thing to my shoulder. And you know, in a way it was kind of a parent-child rite of passage. It was like my children were marking their territory. And I was somewhat ok with it. Being the hilarious comedian that I am I picked Campbell up and walked her over to her Mother in the pool. When I got there I said those words she had heard before, "Uh, I just got peed on." Then I looked my wife in the eyes with a bit of defiance and I sat right down in that swimming pool. Chlorine kills everything right?

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